Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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