a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
