What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
