It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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