update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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