508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
