Tell her she can't have a vagina
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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