she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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