we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
