2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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