Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
