Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
