just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
