My cat gives me a boner
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
