I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
