I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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