hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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