Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize