I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
