YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize