i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize