Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
nutella sex= disaster
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
