i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
