i permit you to call me
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
