Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
our cab driver is having phone sex.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
