The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
