All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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