a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
