I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
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Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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