we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize