dude i'm inner monologue high
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
