i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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