So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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