My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.