That's intense
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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