Pants 0. Shit 1.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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