i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
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OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
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While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
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