Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
