Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
