i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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