let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize
