Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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