Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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