I wish i was in the wii world.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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