we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
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