So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Randomize
