My friends, they love my intelligence
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.