I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
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