So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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