dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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